Personal Safety
Keeping Safe in a Violent World: A Guide for Women
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By Jill Valentino
According to the World Health Organization (WHO), nearly 1 in 3, or 30% of women, have been subjected to violence worldwide. Additionally, the Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN) reports that 1 out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime. While these harrowing statistics are frightening, hiding at home is not the answer; neither is holding onto the belief that nothing could ever happen to you. Instead, all women and girls should be proactive, learning as much as possible about safety and self-defense.
Martial arts and self-defense expert, third-degree black belt, and Head Tang Soo Do instructor Gabrielle Crusco is well-versed in what women and girls should know to help them stay safe in an increasingly violent world. Crusco strongly advocates for martial arts education, not only as a benefit for learning self-defense skills, but as a fun and exciting way to stay in shape and build confidence. She shares her knowledge to encourage women everywhere to take steps to keep themselves safe from predators.
Martial arts and self-defense expert, third-degree black belt, and Head Tang Soo Do instructor Gabrielle Crusco is well-versed in what women and girls should know to help them stay safe in an increasingly violent world. Crusco strongly advocates for martial arts education, not only as a benefit for learning self-defense skills, but as a fun and exciting way to stay in shape and build confidence. She shares her knowledge to encourage women everywhere to take steps to keep themselves safe from predators.
Safety Rule Number One
When asked what the most important rule is for living safely as a woman in 2023, Crusco immediately responded, “Be aware of your surroundings.” She advises women, even on a routine outing to the store, to “Be conscious of everything around you. Don’t have tunnel vision or focus only on what you need to do or get.”
This awareness Crusco speaks of extends to even where you park your car. “Remember where you park. If it’s nighttime, ask yourself these questions: ‘Is the area well-lit?’ ‘What do I have on me that could help [if I'm attacked]?’ ‘Are my keys readily available if I need to defend myself?’ ‘Are there other people in the area?’”
Crusco adds, “Self-awareness is so important, as is knowing that anything can happen at any moment. We hope nothing ever does, but you must still ask yourself, ‘Am I prepared?”
When asked what the most important rule is for living safely as a woman in 2023, Crusco immediately responded, “Be aware of your surroundings.” She advises women, even on a routine outing to the store, to “Be conscious of everything around you. Don’t have tunnel vision or focus only on what you need to do or get.”
This awareness Crusco speaks of extends to even where you park your car. “Remember where you park. If it’s nighttime, ask yourself these questions: ‘Is the area well-lit?’ ‘What do I have on me that could help [if I'm attacked]?’ ‘Are my keys readily available if I need to defend myself?’ ‘Are there other people in the area?’”
Crusco adds, “Self-awareness is so important, as is knowing that anything can happen at any moment. We hope nothing ever does, but you must still ask yourself, ‘Am I prepared?”
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Additional Safe Living Tips
Another essential safety precaution Crusco recommends to women and girls, especially when out alone, is to trust your gut. “You know that gut feeling you get when things just feel ‘off’'? Listen to it,” she says. |
“You know that gut feeling you get when things just feel ‘off’? Listen to it.” ~ Gabrielle Crusco |
Crusco also encourages women and girls to “know the area they are going to.” She adds, “It’s okay to go to those areas alone, but know what is happening around you and what resources are available there.” If traveling to an unfamiliar area, Crusco’s advice is to “Let someone know where you are. Text a friend or relative to give them a heads-up. This way, if your ability to communicate gets cut off, somebody knows right away.”
Additionally, if in an unfamiliar area, Crusco recommends that women and girls “pull anything from your car that you want to carry with you [for self-defense]. For instance,” she continues, “I have a keychain that acts as a self-defense tool, so I’m going to carry my keys in my hand rather than in my purse.”
One other safety tip Crusco shared is the importance of presentation. “Men will go after what they deem ‘weak links,’” she explains. “If you look like you will fight back, if you stare straight at someone and let them know you are aware of them, they will be less likely to approach you.”
Why Women and Girls Are Frequent Targets
Regarding what to look for in a possible ‘attacker,’ Crusco explains why a one-size-fits-all profile does not exist. “Unfortunately, in this day and age, you don’t know whom you’re going to be dealing with,” she explains. “You may be confronted by someone who just wants money and will grab your purse and run, or someone on drugs [whose behavior will likely be unpredictable] might accost you.”
“Statistically speaking,” Crisco explains, “men are going to go after women. Men will go after men sometimes, but that’s not the norm; typically, men go after women. Women are often the target of male attackers because they are expected not to fight back. So, as a woman, if you get into a situation with a male attacker, you need to resist hard. Don’t just try to squirm out of it; use force. Stop him. You have to remember that in many cases, it’s your life or his.”
Defending Yourself During a Physical Assault
According to Crusco, how one handles herself in a violent situation depends on two factors. One is how (or if) you are being grabbed. The other factor is what the attacker’s ‘objective’ is with you. Crusco explains, “If they just want to rob you and take your purse, let them. But if you know you are fighting for your life or are about to be sexually assaulted, your fight-or-flight response will kick in. Because of adrenaline, you will be stronger than you usually are, and that’s when you need to use force.”
When using force to defend yourself, Crusco recommends targeting the following areas:
“Targeting those areas will stun an attacker as they are vital parts of the body,” Crusco explains, “and will give you that second you need to get away.”
Other self-defense tactics Crusco recommends include:
If you do plan to take a self-defense course, Crusco recommends that you take several classes or practice what you learned in class frequently enough to become comfortable using it if you need to.
Remember that being proactive and aware of your surroundings will help you to avoid being the victim of a physical assault, which is always best.
One other safety tip Crusco shared is the importance of presentation. “Men will go after what they deem ‘weak links,’” she explains. “If you look like you will fight back, if you stare straight at someone and let them know you are aware of them, they will be less likely to approach you.”
Why Women and Girls Are Frequent Targets
Regarding what to look for in a possible ‘attacker,’ Crusco explains why a one-size-fits-all profile does not exist. “Unfortunately, in this day and age, you don’t know whom you’re going to be dealing with,” she explains. “You may be confronted by someone who just wants money and will grab your purse and run, or someone on drugs [whose behavior will likely be unpredictable] might accost you.”
“Statistically speaking,” Crisco explains, “men are going to go after women. Men will go after men sometimes, but that’s not the norm; typically, men go after women. Women are often the target of male attackers because they are expected not to fight back. So, as a woman, if you get into a situation with a male attacker, you need to resist hard. Don’t just try to squirm out of it; use force. Stop him. You have to remember that in many cases, it’s your life or his.”
Defending Yourself During a Physical Assault
According to Crusco, how one handles herself in a violent situation depends on two factors. One is how (or if) you are being grabbed. The other factor is what the attacker’s ‘objective’ is with you. Crusco explains, “If they just want to rob you and take your purse, let them. But if you know you are fighting for your life or are about to be sexually assaulted, your fight-or-flight response will kick in. Because of adrenaline, you will be stronger than you usually are, and that’s when you need to use force.”
When using force to defend yourself, Crusco recommends targeting the following areas:
- Groin Area (especially if the attacker is male)
- Solar Plexus
- Nose
- Eyes
- Anywhere on the face
“Targeting those areas will stun an attacker as they are vital parts of the body,” Crusco explains, “and will give you that second you need to get away.”
Other self-defense tactics Crusco recommends include:
- Using your body weight against an attacker. “If somebody tries to pick you up,” Crusco explains, “drop all your weight to the ground. Be ‘dead weight’ so they can’t pick you up, and try to find an access point to stun them with force, so that you have the moment you need to get away.”
- If you are on your back, use your feet to kick the attacker off you. Once you succeed, get up as quickly as you can.
- If an attacker has a weapon, you want to disarm them while avoiding injury to your neck, wrists, or inner thighs. “You want the threat to go away and to take control of their weapon. Most self-defense classes will cover ways to do that,” Crusco explains.
If you do plan to take a self-defense course, Crusco recommends that you take several classes or practice what you learned in class frequently enough to become comfortable using it if you need to.
Remember that being proactive and aware of your surroundings will help you to avoid being the victim of a physical assault, which is always best.
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Additional Resources:
10 Self-Defense Strategies Every Woman Needs to Know Women's Situational Awareness (Avon Police Department) Safety Plans: Domestic Violence, Stalking, Internet, Social Media Jill Valentino is an educator, freelance writer, essayist, tutor, and educational video and teaching materials creator. Her work has been published in Good Housekeeping, Redbook, Country Living, Elle Decor, House Beautiful, Woman's Day, and Hudson Valley Parent magazine. She is a regular contributor for Sanctuary.
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