Healing After Extreme Trauma:
Q&A with Author Lynn Forney
Photo Credit: Laura Flannery
Lynn Forney’s book Choosing Survival: How I Endured a Brutal Attack and a Lifetime of Trauma through the Power of Action, Choice, and Self Expression (Flying Feet Publishing) is excerpted in Sanctuary. In addition to this exclusive excerpt, Lynn has answered questions about her journey and has provided some tools she has used to help herself heal.
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After being brutally attacked and almost killed in your home, what do you remember about the immediate aftermath?
The month after the attack was a whirlwind, to say the least. Immediately after, I was in the hospital for sixteen days. I was on life support for the first five of those. It was incredibly painful, both physically and mentally. But I was also incredibly determined. For the first time in my life, I could truly sense the full magnitude of the strength I had deep within me. I clung to that and found a deep sense of solace and gratitude for it. I had to. |
"For the first time in my life, I could truly sense the full magnitude of the strength I had deep within me. I clung to that and found a deep sense of solace and gratitude for it." ~ Lynn Forney |
Looking back, that first month (and beyond) was tumultuous, terrifying, and filled me with sorrow and anger. I couldn’t understand why this had happened and why I felt like I had to defend myself and my innocence to so many people around me, including the police. It was infuriating. But I was also truly thankful for the love and support I received and tried my best to keep that close to me in the darkest of times. (I still have every card and gift I received during that time.) I was also immensely focused on healing my body and trying desperately to 'return to normal.'
Looking back, that first month (and beyond) was tumultuous, terrifying, and filled me with sorrow and anger. I couldn’t understand why this had happened and why I felt like I had to defend myself and my innocence to so many people around me, including the police. It was infuriating. But I was also truly thankful for the love and support I received and tried my best to keep that close to me in the darkest of times. (I still have every card and gift I received during that time.) I was also immensely focused on healing my body and trying desperately to 'return to normal.'
How long did it take you to come to terms with the attack and to move forward?
My initial response: I still am. I know that may sound discouraging, but I certainly don’t mean it to be. Instead, I say this to offer hope.
I know I have come a long way. I have done an enormous amount of work to understand myself, my past, and how trauma has affected me. But I also know it is an ongoing process. Like many of us, it’s so easy for me to become overly critical, often asking myself things like: Why can’t I just get over it? Why can’t I fully move past this? Why am I still having these reactions? It is during these times that I am able to offer myself compassion and love.
Recovering from trauma is not a straight line, and I, like everyone, deserve grace and perseverance while navigating its winding path. Choosing to do the difficult work, to heal, takes great courage. There is light after the dark.
My initial response: I still am. I know that may sound discouraging, but I certainly don’t mean it to be. Instead, I say this to offer hope.
I know I have come a long way. I have done an enormous amount of work to understand myself, my past, and how trauma has affected me. But I also know it is an ongoing process. Like many of us, it’s so easy for me to become overly critical, often asking myself things like: Why can’t I just get over it? Why can’t I fully move past this? Why am I still having these reactions? It is during these times that I am able to offer myself compassion and love.
Recovering from trauma is not a straight line, and I, like everyone, deserve grace and perseverance while navigating its winding path. Choosing to do the difficult work, to heal, takes great courage. There is light after the dark.
Lynn provides a list of tools and practices that helped her manage the aftermath of her extreme trauma:
- Regular therapy specifically with a trauma specialist: I learned that I lived in a constant state of mild to moderate dissociation and, in time, I was able to become much more present in my body.
- EMDR or Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing: A specific form of therapy that makes your subconscious mind much more accessible. It is intense, and I cannot stress enough the importance of working with an experienced licensed clinical therapist you trust.
- Art: For me this centered around dance, but there are so many incredible tools that the arts offer for healing, including various art therapies (music, art, dance, etc.).
- Reconnecting with my body through activity: From high intensity activities like weightlifting and boxing (excellent for releasing anger), to more mind/body practices like Pilates and Yoga.
- Breath work: I didn’t find this until more recently, but I find it incredibly powerful.
- EFT Tapping (a mind-body method of tapping acupuncture points).
- Mindset classes/workshops.
- Writing/Journaling.
- Meditation/Prayer/Chakra Balancing.
- Reconnecting with nature: This can be as simple as standing in the grass with bare feet, but something that offers moments of stillness while connecting with something greater than ourselves.
- Moving energy/anger: The three best ways to move energy are breath, movement and sound. It needs to move. Keeping it stagnant only allows things to fester and grow.
- Education: The more you understand how the mind works and the effects of trauma, the easier it is to move forward and heal. This can come from reading books to taking classes and workshops. There are many resources that are free.
- Support: Family, friends, support groups. Understand that you are not alone.
- Advocate for yourself.
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Ever since Lynn Forney was a child, she loved to dance and perform. At just three years old, she was cheerleading, and she began taking formal dance classes at age eight. Being on stage for the first time proved to be exhilarating. Years later, she would attend a performing arts high school, and she received a BFA with highest honors from the University of Florida. Since then, she has performed and choreographed for various dance companies throughout the South.
While dancing, she wanted to expand into new territories and began taking acting classes which led to appearances in various movies and TV shows. She has also written, produced, directed and starred in two short films, one of which is getting ready to enter the film festival circuit. She continues to pursue these interests and looks forward to combining her diverse skills with her passion for healing through the arts. |
Click book cover for excerpt.
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