Smart Steps
Women business leaders and entrepreneurs from various industries share their tips and advice in a "quick read format" on a variety topics.
Topic: Less Can Really Be More
October 2023
Deborah Cole
Author, Speaker, Photographer |
Deborah Cole leads first from the heart. Armed with a graduate degree, she founded and led a multimillion-dollar company with 10 locations and 500+ team members in the State of Texas. As the company’s president, Deborah supported the next generation of leaders who took charge when the company became employee-owned.
Since 2017, she has completed an MSF at Seminary of the Southwest and focused full-time on writing, speaking and photography. She is the author of Letting Go: How Less Becomes More and SHE (Believed She Could So She Did). She is also co-author of Black Women in Business: Journeys in Resilience. "As I let go of decades of possessions, I also let go of commitments made which were no longer in my best interest. In providing space in my new, smaller home and larger, more spacious life, I expanded and grew far beyond my wildest dreams." ~ Deborah Cole |
Can less really be more?
Unequivocally, yes! And I say this without reservation. I am always eager to share this truth with others. If we reframe the concept that “less” is not "loss" but is a release of things and beliefs – some which no longer serve us – we can celebrate the thing or the situation, then give it release.
As founder and president of a successful company, I was occupied. As a wife and mother, my days were full of responsibilities and commitments. This was my life for 35 years. It is true that I loved every moment and, weirdly enough, welcomed more obligations through church, community service, and volunteer duties. Sound familiar?
Along with time commitments, my world was full of “stuff,” those possessions that screamed success. I don’t know who counts these things, but experts tell us we have over 300,000 items occupying our homes. These include technology, décor, heirlooms, kid equipment as well as impulse purchases that fill our drawers, closets, garages, and storage units.
I lived the American Dream until 2017 when things began to shift. Over the course of a few years, children left home, we sold our family home, I sold my business and, sadly, my husband became ill and passed away. All of the possessions as well as the identities that were mine slipped away. I was introduced to the concept of minimalism and found that I had choices in how I responded to “less.” As I released possessions and commitments, and even experienced situations beyond my control, I had choices on how to view each. I was no longer the ‘managing director’ of a family of active kids and spouse, no longer the leader of a multimillion-dollar organization, and no longer a wife. There were, of course, many emotions attached to each change. It was up to me how I managed my attachments.
The release from the 24/7 busyness and the attachment to whom I believed I must be provided a freedom that was new to me. Over time, I found a joy that I had not experienced since childhood. As I let go of decades of possessions, I also let go of commitments made which were no longer in my best interest. In providing space in my new, smaller home and larger, more spacious life, I expanded and grew far beyond my wildest dreams. As I encounter younger individuals reacting in the same way, I know that these choices are available to anyone at any point in life.
Here is a list of things I learned along the way.
Unequivocally, yes! And I say this without reservation. I am always eager to share this truth with others. If we reframe the concept that “less” is not "loss" but is a release of things and beliefs – some which no longer serve us – we can celebrate the thing or the situation, then give it release.
As founder and president of a successful company, I was occupied. As a wife and mother, my days were full of responsibilities and commitments. This was my life for 35 years. It is true that I loved every moment and, weirdly enough, welcomed more obligations through church, community service, and volunteer duties. Sound familiar?
Along with time commitments, my world was full of “stuff,” those possessions that screamed success. I don’t know who counts these things, but experts tell us we have over 300,000 items occupying our homes. These include technology, décor, heirlooms, kid equipment as well as impulse purchases that fill our drawers, closets, garages, and storage units.
I lived the American Dream until 2017 when things began to shift. Over the course of a few years, children left home, we sold our family home, I sold my business and, sadly, my husband became ill and passed away. All of the possessions as well as the identities that were mine slipped away. I was introduced to the concept of minimalism and found that I had choices in how I responded to “less.” As I released possessions and commitments, and even experienced situations beyond my control, I had choices on how to view each. I was no longer the ‘managing director’ of a family of active kids and spouse, no longer the leader of a multimillion-dollar organization, and no longer a wife. There were, of course, many emotions attached to each change. It was up to me how I managed my attachments.
The release from the 24/7 busyness and the attachment to whom I believed I must be provided a freedom that was new to me. Over time, I found a joy that I had not experienced since childhood. As I let go of decades of possessions, I also let go of commitments made which were no longer in my best interest. In providing space in my new, smaller home and larger, more spacious life, I expanded and grew far beyond my wildest dreams. As I encounter younger individuals reacting in the same way, I know that these choices are available to anyone at any point in life.
Here is a list of things I learned along the way.
- Letting go does not mean loss. By letting go, we allow space to let in the good. Less debt means more financial freedom. Less perfectionism means more authenticity. Less stress means more well-being. Less fear means more courage. Less comparison means more self-acceptance.
- Letting go takes time. Cleaning out a storage unit, clearing a closet, unboxing stored items doesn’t have to be done overnight. Slowly releasing possessions for the benefit of others is a privilege and a joy to be savored.
- Letting go of identity is not easy. It takes time to achieve certain positions. When it is time to move on, we can feel gratitude for the opportunity, but we realize that there is something more exciting just ahead for us.
- Letting go of unhealthy attachments to beliefs, situations, and relationships always (yes, ALWAYS) results in beautiful outcomes.
- Don’t make sudden moves. Start small. Clean out one drawer in your home. Resign one committee membership that does not give you joy. When you take these baby steps, do not backtrack, keep moving forward.
- When there are life changes not of your choosing, take time to feel the loss and know that corners will be turned.
